So, before we get into the discussion of who’s on your team, I need to explain that when I say “team,” I am not only talking about your work/business teams. I am also talking about your dating/marriage relationships, your friends, and your family.
You see one definition of team is simply a group of people who work together to accomplish a goal and one thing that makes a good team is when everyone on the team is working towards the same goal.
But of course, we have all been on “teams,” where it was obvious everyone was not working towards the same goal, and I am sure many of us have also been hurt and disappointed by those who we believed were on the same team as us.
Unfortunately, there are situations where we don’t get to choose who is on our team such as our family and many times our coworkers. However, we do get to choose the proximity and access we give these “team” members.
These last three years I have learned some difficult lessons about who I have allowed to be on my “team,” I’ve experienced a lot of shock and disappointment professionally and personally, and I wanted to share some of my biggest takeaways, to hopefully help someone else.
First, I want to share some important things to look for when you are looking to connect with people professionally or personally.
- Do you share similar values? – Amos 3:3 says “can two walk together, except they be agreed?”
- Do you agree on the vision and how to best obtain it? – It’s easy to share the same vision but have completely different ideas of how to accomplish it. Differing opinions is not bad but remember the end does not always justify the means.
- Can you be honest with each other? – Those closest to you should be the ones that can always tell you the truth and vice versa.
Those are just a few of the things that you should be looking at when you’re looking to partner in business, when you’re looking to make friends, when you’re looking for a spouse, or when you’re looking to add people to your “team.”
The sad thing is you can be the most cautious person and you will still end up with some people on your “team” that let you down and unfortunately sometimes those who were supposedly on your “team” hurt you more than anyone else.
But Jesus taught us the greatest lesson about those who hurt and betray us. These people actually serve a purpose and most of the time their purpose not only makes us better, but they push us closer to our destiny.
Just as Judas betrayed Jesus and Joseph’s brothers betrayed him, what the enemy meant for evil, God turned it around for good.
So, there’s value in your Judas/haters/betrayers….
- Help increase your discernment – There are always red flags and warnings when we hook up with the wrong people, but we often choose to overlook them. God will allow us to be exposed to these betrayers in hopes that we will grow in discernment and listening when the Holy Spirit warns us.
- Opportunity to show God’s love – It’s real easy to love those who love us, but it takes the power of the Holy Spirit to love those who do us wrong. This is how the world knows we follow Jesus by our love.
- It keeps your focus on Jesus – Let’s be honest, people are fickle. People will let you down and move on without a second thought. It’s sad, but we live in a sin-filled world and without dying continuously to self, we are all capable of being a Judas. Every time someone hurts you, it’s a reminder that your hope and dependence should be in no one, but Jesus.
As we are getting closer to a new year, now is a great time to take an inventory of the people that are on your “teams” professionally and personally. Some “team” members were only meant for a season, others may be meant for a “reason,” (get the lesson) and some could be in your life for a while.
If God has blessed you with some “purpose partners,” I encourage you to not take them for granted, but to invest in these relationships instead of getting discouraged and distracted by those who disappoint you.
And last, but definitely not least, always remember to be the kind of “teammate,” that you are expecting others to be.
